Wuuaarrgghh~~!

.... menggeliat~
best gler siot.. ari ni 12 jam aku tdo... from 1700 to 0502... lame siot xtdo lame2 camni.. syok giler.. tp yg xbestnye, aku trlepas solat asar, maghrib n isya'..mkn mlm pn x.. hamek ko.. da mcm Snorlax da aku tdo td.. haha..
Hmm~ ish.. sejuk giler siot.. da brape ari ni asek ujan jek.. menggigil aku dbuatnye..
smalam senior2 aku da comission.. aku tolong wat fatigue mknan kt 1 Melayu 2... perhh.. best siot da komissen... lg 2 tahun turn aku plak.. cambest jek kn dpt komissen.. huuh..cmne la nt agknye ble aku komisen..
hmm..aku terasa bebas beberapa ari ni.. xde org nk kongkong aku.. lantak aku la nk watpe... 2 yg smpai 12 jam aku tdo 2... haha..
ermm.. aku agk terkilan la..topek da xbrape layan aku.. sbb aku xdtg function besday Mattop ari 2.. Sori la dowh.. aku nk jge ati org.. tp aku xsgke plak ati ko terguris mse 2... sori Apek...


hmm.. mse TTS ari 2, bru aku dpt tgkap prasaan ko cmne kwn.. mmg hangin rupenye ble kne sound ngn mmber sndiri d saat cm2.. sblm2 ni aku leh aggap gurauan jek, tp ari 2 aku mmg terasa keBABIan dye.. Poyo nk mampos.. Xpe kwn.. dye da berubah.. dye nk ape, kte bg la nt.. agknye baru puas ati dye...

hmm.. nothing more 2 say lg la.. kt dlm blog skg xleh nk tulis mcm2 lg da.. nt ade jek pihak yg perasan terasa.. kalo x perasan pn, pihak yg sebenar 2 sendiri terasa.. da aku nk kne cover blik plak.. nk jge ati..

da laa.. xsyok da nk tulis2 blog ni.. Blah~

Dilemma

Aku serabut..! SERABUT..!! Arrghh... Girls.. knape korg bergado...?? xleh ke korg bek2 jek.. aku da mental da ni.. dua-dua pn aku syg.. dua-dua baik n syg kt aku jgk... ape kputusan aku skg.. aku xtau nk wat ape... aku hanya mampu berdiam diri.. it's wat i always do.. Hmm.. Girls.. korg pn da nmpk kn.. I love both of u.. n if korg rse aku ni x setia.. aku relakan korg pergi.. carila lelaki yg setia... aku xmampu nk jge ati salah sorg drpd korg n break hati yg sorg lg.. if aku perlu wat kputusan, aku decide.. aku xnk dua-dua pn.. Argghh!! ape aku ckp ni..? pening sial.. mcm dlm filem plak,.. Ceit! huh!! aku da jadik bodo skang ni.. aku nk sendirian.. biarla aku sendiri dulu.. aku xmau contact both of u 4 now... tgula aku da tenang or aku ade penyelesaian, atau korg pn ade penyelesaian.. Sorry, my Queens....

it's not all bout u...

fhm x..? bkn kmu sorg jek yg ad dlm idup sy ni.. jgn nk terasa xmasal2.. byk bnde yg berlaku dlm idup sy.. byk org2 yg men peranan dlm idup sy.. sy xleh fokus kt kmu sorg jek.. kamu slalu wat kputusan cmni.. skg sy nk stuju ngn kputusan awk 2.. bole..?? kte try ea...

da x bez..

Da jadik xbez... hahaha.. nk tau mnde yg da x bez.. Hah! ade ler... xnk gtau da.. Hmm... missing all those people yg da xde lg n da lost contact... byk citer da... tp xbyk yg aku rela nk tulis kt cni... bia la dok dlm pale otak aku jek.. xyah la ko da bce ni, ko nk tye aku ape mslh aku dlm nada caring.. Laan sai la lu...! xbole caye pye olang la lu... I know my own self and I decide my own rites.. juz get off from my back..k..? aku da xde ati nk tulis lg... aku nk tulis ngn Mr Drago... Chow..!

owh..shit...

i'm fucked up... aku tertido lalu aku terlepas janji nk g tgk teater dgn gadisku... damn..! dye sungguh..SUNGGUH MARAH...!! n aku lak xtau nk wat ape.. lalu mengambil tindakan mendiamkn diri sahaja.. aku xtau nk ckp pe kt dye.. mst dye marah punya la,.. kalo aku pn mst aku marah punya... haiih... cmne leh tertdo ni.. ni msti tekanan exam LKU yg hancus td ni.. Gadisku... maafkn aku.. sesungguhnya tdo 2 xsalah... pliss forgive me~ (dlm nada lagu Bryan Adams- Please Forgive Me..)...
huh... hambar siot.. da lar da wat salah.. wat hambar plak... sori my Girl...

Forgive me, 4 i have sinned...

i dedicate diz 2 u all my frens.. my beloved frens.. whom i've known 4 bout 3 years alredy.. who helped me when i was in sadness, hardness, and PAIN... i never tot dat i'll be like diz.. hey,, we used 2 have all those fun 2gether.. we're like brother n sisters... but, HOW THE HELL THAT I HAVE ABANDONED U ALL...?? Shit..! thanx Little Red.., our talk dat evening had made me realize.. dat i've been lost in my own world.. a world called "LOVE".. i realize now how cruel i've been 2 my precious frens.. all bcoz i'm being so crazy bout love.. y don't u guys told me earlier bot diz...?? or is it me, who dodged those advices..?? i've been selfish.. i ain't thinking bout ur feelings... especially u 2... My Little Mushroom n Awek..

Awek.. 4 all i could remember.. u are d only girl who've known the darker side of me.. u have been there.., u saw me.., n u know wat kind of person i am.. but, yet u still keep it silence..mentioned n talked only wif people who also have known it.. we always travel 2gether 2 N9 b4 i continue home.. we spend times 2gether n have fun in KL b4 we get back 2 our own lazy-bored hometown.. n most of dat time we would have..
My Little Mushroom... U are sooo00 important 2 me.. u are the closest 2 me.. u know much bout me and understand me very well.. we've always been there when we need each other.. u comfort me when i was uneasy.. u introduce me 2 ur family..n i am so happy 2 know n met ur sis n ur mother..! they are realy nice people... it's juz me who are so fucked-up.. u teach me a lot of things.. if there's no u, i'll never get 2 know diz city diz much.. i could'nt survive if u never thought me all dat.. heyy.., i spent most time wif u than i spent wif my 'siblings'.. there are so much more dat i could say bout u rite now, but dat would costs me the whole nite, n morn..

Alrite, i wanted 2 say diz in front of both of u.. but i dont know how 2 confont u guys anymoe.. i'm ashamed of myself.. u guys are probably sick looking me spending time wif my Girlfren when i'm free, rite..? n i've actually forget bout u n how we used 2 be... u all must be so mad at me rite..? heh.. Awek, who are 1 tough girl n not a type of emotional gal, had showed her opinion yesterday... but i dont take it seriously untill... Little Red told me everything dat evening..and she also made me realize why u started being so cold 2 me, my own kawan baik, Little Mushroom. it's started when i refuse 2 have brekfast wif u coz i wanted 2 meet my Girlfren rite..?

Oh God..! i'm so stuck over here.. i want my Girlfren..! but i dont wanna lose my frens..! this precious little frens whom i've known long b4 i met wif my Girlfren..!
Arrgh....! cant u all juz get along..? Awek, Little Mushroom, Girlfren..n of coz u 2, Miss Little Red... i really want u all 2 juz get along wif me.. hey.. Girlfren realy want 2 spend time wif u Little Mushroom.. she told me dat she missed u... realy..! n i see u've overcome ur stage fright yeah..? hepi 4 dat...
N miss Girlfren... i hope u would understand me.. there's no other feelings toward Awek n Little Mushroom.. they are my BEST FRIENDS!! n i appreciate them so much..

alrite.. enough...stop...tears...

owh... I'm so fucked-up...

konvofuckingfest

aku bkn benci..
malulah aku nkk ngaku..tp aku mmg jeles.. jeles ble tgk ko mlyan org ngurat ko.. mmg trang2 nmpk la org 2 nk ngurat ko.. sume org leh nmpk.. agk2 ble kwn2 aku bkak fb ko..pas2 bce komen2 mggatal 2 sume, dorg ckp pe..? "raje, bia betol ni awek ko?" "eh, awek ko psg len dowh!" "ko da kne maen la raje.." n mcm2 lg aku pk dorg bole ckp la... ngn sifat aku yg slalu bodoh2 ni mmg x mustahil org nk ckp cm2 kt aku.. bangang aku ni..
ko mrh aku kwn2 ngn dak2 pmpn.. even aku tgk pn ko sepak aku.. aku ikut ckp ko.. aku xkwn ngn dak pmpn 2.. sbb aku xperlukn dorg.. aku prlukan ko.. baru2 ni pn ade jek pmpn nk knal ngn aku.. tp awal2 lg aku ckp kt dorg aku da ade awek, aku syg kt awek aku 2.. serta merta dorg xjdk kwn.. tp ade aku ksah..? X! lgsg aku xksah..! sbb aku xnk kwn ngn dorg..aku da ade byk kwn2..aku da ade gf aku yg aku syg sgt2.. smpaikan ade sorg mmbe aku ni tegur aku.. "raje, ko jgn mnjekn sgt... jge diri ko 2 dlu.." huh.. xsgke lak ak nmpk smpai mcm terabai diri sndri..

somak nk blanje aku nasik.. aku lapar.. siyez lapar.. tp aku segan ngn ko somak.. ko baek ngn aku.. ko lg nk blnje aku.. ble ko ckp ko kwn ngn aku bkn sbb duit, aku terasa..... ko mmg kwn aku somak.. walaupn perangai ko kdg2 wat aku menyampah, tp ko la kwn yg baek.. trimas somak..

mlm ni patotnye kte dok sme2.. aku nk brsame2 ngn ko.. ko mtk aku belikan bunga.. aku xde duit.. siyez da abes lgsg da.. bsnes aku rugi.. aku siap berutang lg nk ganti modal smlm.. tp aku xnk hampakn ko..aku xnk malu sbb xde duit.. aku pnjam dlu duit mmbe aku.. tp dpt rm10 jek.. n smapi kt sne, tbe2 meon plak prlukan rm10 nk byr simcard u-pax.. dye dire sgt nk beli mse tgh xde duit ni apsal... aku jadik serba salah.. biasenye, aku akn bg kt mmber2 baek aku ni duit 2.. walau 2 jek yg aku ade.. tp psl td aku da jnji nk bg ko bunga.. kalo meon nmpk aku belikan ko bunga plak, msti dye pikir aku lbh pntgkan awek dri mmber.. sudahnye aku decide biar sume xdpt..

ble smpai kt ats.. ko da dpt sit da.. xperla xde sit utk aku psl ko kate ko smpai2 da penuh kn.. bt ko juz tgk je la aku berdiri kt c2.. xde rase nk tman aku ke.. fine.. aku pn da xde rase nk brdiri kt ats 2.. better ak blk dok ats kusi.. type blog.. luah prasaan skit ati ni.. ni je pn privacy yg ade..

dah... aku bkn bnci ko pn.. aku syg giler kt ko.. n ko pn syg giler kt aku.. aku harap ko bole nmpk.....